UNCANNY X-MEN #511
Review by: mongo
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Size: pages
Price: 2.99
This review contains spoilers, click here to read
Oh how can the X-men fail me in so many ways. I've been getting X-men for about 15 years and I've now come to the point where I'm really seriously thinking its time to lay down my sword and drop my shield because I can't defend this book anymore. This book is asking you to swallow a lot of crap to get through the story. For example, Domino was conveniently driving past Westchester and digs up Jean's body and put in another corpse for Madelyne to find. This leap of faith falls faster than a tubby kid chasing after the ice cream truck.
The story gets so disjointed that things start to fall off and never picked back up. For starters you got Cyclops saying that the X men are pissed on page 4 but at the end of the story he's appealing to Madelyne's better side? What are you doing? This makes no sense unless you don't believe that Cyclops has no resolve to do the necessary thing? Why put a hand out to "rescue" Madelyne and set a trap if you are righteously pissed that the Sisterhood trashed your place and supposedly taken the children from last issue? Did we see anything in this issue mentioning the children, well no, are we going to see anything next issue, hell no! They dropped a huge plot point from one issue to the next, and this makes the story smell like a week old turd.
Now this might sound like I'm foaming at the mouth and gone doggone rabid, but don't reach for the rabies shots yet because I haven't gotten started about the whole Psylocke turn. So blasting Kwannon/Psylocke in the face with Dazzler's beam was going to distract the bad Psylocke so that the good Psylocke to win? Why is this all in the mental realm when you have the good Psylocke just tied up? How about making this a physical battle between the two besides making Dazzler relevant in this title for the first time in forever.
I think Fraction can put some good stuff together but he's burden with so much crap over the years that he doesn't have the room to breathe. I think that M Day should have wiped all the characters out and just restart the series with some fresh characters so that a good writer can start with a blank slate. Give this series either the room to breathe or burn the motherfuckin house down. Because the roof is on fire and they ain't no saving this crap.
I'm kicking this book to the curb like a red headed stepchild. I'm also calling out Ron in this review and dare him to find a good excuse to keep buying this book because this has become so irredeemable that to keep buying this book is like buying a bargain bin enema kit. Please all X men fans drop this book and let Marvel know that they have to fix this book quickly.
The story gets so disjointed that things start to fall off and never picked back up. For starters you got Cyclops saying that the X men are pissed on page 4 but at the end of the story he's appealing to Madelyne's better side? What are you doing? This makes no sense unless you don't believe that Cyclops has no resolve to do the necessary thing? Why put a hand out to "rescue" Madelyne and set a trap if you are righteously pissed that the Sisterhood trashed your place and supposedly taken the children from last issue? Did we see anything in this issue mentioning the children, well no, are we going to see anything next issue, hell no! They dropped a huge plot point from one issue to the next, and this makes the story smell like a week old turd.
Now this might sound like I'm foaming at the mouth and gone doggone rabid, but don't reach for the rabies shots yet because I haven't gotten started about the whole Psylocke turn. So blasting Kwannon/Psylocke in the face with Dazzler's beam was going to distract the bad Psylocke so that the good Psylocke to win? Why is this all in the mental realm when you have the good Psylocke just tied up? How about making this a physical battle between the two besides making Dazzler relevant in this title for the first time in forever.
I think Fraction can put some good stuff together but he's burden with so much crap over the years that he doesn't have the room to breathe. I think that M Day should have wiped all the characters out and just restart the series with some fresh characters so that a good writer can start with a blank slate. Give this series either the room to breathe or burn the motherfuckin house down. Because the roof is on fire and they ain't no saving this crap.
I'm kicking this book to the curb like a red headed stepchild. I'm also calling out Ron in this review and dare him to find a good excuse to keep buying this book because this has become so irredeemable that to keep buying this book is like buying a bargain bin enema kit. Please all X men fans drop this book and let Marvel know that they have to fix this book quickly.
Story: 1 - Poor
Art: 2 - Average
Art: 2 - Average
I don’t think you’re reading this book correctly. I think we’re all supposed to be exchanging creepy frozen smiles while remarking about how sexually liberated this band of X-Men and X-villains are, and how great it is that they can live like irresponsible rock stars in San Francisco, co-opting the local government and taking over a military base. (pause) But seriously, I actually like this series alright. It’s fun to see it’s triumphs and its ridiculous artistic shortcomings. It seems like with every new creative team many fans think that X-Men is "back", when really it’s only been REALLY good, by any stretch of the imagination, twice in the last 15+ years. Once you accept that, the average decent X-run becomes more enjoyable and more bearable.
I didn’t like this issue but it actually made me look forward to the upcoming arcs and the Dark Avengers crossover, where it seems like they’ll be more integrated into the Marvel U.
I can’t quite put my finger on why I’ve been liking the book recently but disliked this particular issue. I guess it’s because the climax didn’t quite justify the buildup. We did get Psylocke back, though, who’s an old favorite.
I really can’t stand stories where the villians escape via teleportation or portals. Any cliches borrowed from The Superfriends cartoon should be avoided unless done with a wink and a nod.
@mongo Ron may not love this particular issue, but he will continue collecting x-men, as will I. The whole point of being a long-standing x-collector is waiting for the good shit to come out. Sooner or later, the series will pick up steam again. I do agree with ohcaroline though. I think the dark spin on the x-family could possibly some kick ass material. Didn’t care for the review there buddy. sorry
interesting review. I find myself agreeing in the main but vadamowens says, there is no way most of the long term readers are going to drop this book. I want to drop it so much but I also want the dodsons to come on the book and make it better.