The OTHER Lantern Corps

Now that the previews to the prelude to War of the Green Lanterns are in full swing, the DC Universe is starting to look a bit like the Crayola factory. I’m anticipating a few more characters and maybe even some new Lantern Corps to join the fray. Even after Blackest Night, there are plenty of colors and emotions left in the spectrum. And I’m sure that if Stan Lee could come up with superhero mascots for all the NHL teams, surely Geoff Johns can give us a couple more Lantern Corps. Then I got to thinking, which really is rarely a good thing, and I came up with some new teams and their oaths.

So here are a few new Lantern Corps that will never see the light of Brightest Day…

Team Pink Lanterns (Gossip)

Spawned from the dark corners of Sweet Valley High’s hallways, the Pink Lantern power battery feeds on the drama, gossip, and rumors of teenage girls. At least that’s what Becky said, and she’s like totally into that weird stuff. OMG did you see her making out with that weirdo from bio class? Ew. And she totally let him put his hand up her shirt. Gah-ross. Like, what’s her damage? (And you thought that blood stuff the Red Lanterns spit up was toxic). 

In brightest day, in blackest night – or whatever 
No evil shall escape my sight!
Seriously. I totally saw you make out with Becky.
Beware my texting power… Pink Lantern's light!
Woo! Go Team Pink Lanterns!

 

Taupe Lanterns (Ambivalence)

  

Based in a messy apartment in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, the Taupe Lanterns don’t really do much of anything. They spend most of their time lounging in dive bars, ironically wearing scarves in 70-degree weather, and discussing bands way too cool for you to have even heard of. The Taupe Lantern power battery is a half-drank can of PBR, and instead of rings, the TLs wear Buddy Holly glasses.

In bri– Eh….

 

The Magenta Moxies (Moxie)

      

When your home world is called “Hellhole” you tend to be a bit more… resourceful than other Lantern Corps. You need guts, you need swagger, you need moxie. With a power battery constructed from the remnants of Green Lantern Jack T. Chance’s lost finger and ring, the Magenta Moxies wield their purple-ish light with real chutzpah!  

You who are wicked, evil and mean,
We’re the feistiest bunch you've ever seen!
Come one, come all, put up a fight
We'll pound your butts with Magenta light!
Yowza.

 

Chartreuse Lanterns (Chaos)          

             

Less a Lantern Corps and more a pack of insane anarchists, the Chartreuse Lanterns are the definition of wild card. They use their chaos powers to distupt the balance and order the Guardians thrive to keep in the universe – to put it crudely, they fuck shit up. A power battery was created is a freak accident involving Mountain Dew and a Commodore 64, but it's pretty useless when it comes to centralizing its power source. If a power ring was ever to find the Joker, this would be the one.   

In brightest night and blackest day 
We run amok and get in your way
Our green light– "Green? I thought it was yellow?" "No, it's green." "Seriously?" "Dude!" ""Oh, right."
–Anyway, our green light is a siren to lead you astray
Ummm… and we really like playing with death rays
With liberty and justice for all!

 

There you have it! A new line-up of Lantern Corps to wreck havoc on color blind comic readers everywhere. Special thanks to Dan Faust for photoshopping all these cooky costumes. 

 

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Ali Colluccio spends way to much time thinking about superheroes. Follow her on the Twitterz for deep thoughts and everyday misadventures.