Cyclops vs. Doctor Spectro
"Please refrain from horseplay at the perimeter of the pool."
"Lifeguard, eh?"
"Just a concerned citizen. Scott Summers."
"Doc. Spectro. Mutants count as citizens these days, do they?"
"I don't write the laws. Now, if you'll please leave us alone. Your garish speedo is alarming some of my students."
"Free country. Bit too free, if you ask me."
"Please stop staring at my wife."
"Gotta gawk enough for the both of us, Ray Charles."
"Just stop cartwheeling around the pool."
"Is that a whistle?"
Julian Assange vs. Ra's al Ghul
"Julian."
"رأس الغول"
"Ra's is fine. I grow weary of this Julian."
"Do you? The fun's just beginning."
"If you release the locations for the Lazarus Pits–"
"If I do."
"You will. Let's not be childish."
"You're sure my organization has access to such coordinates. Such carefully guarded secrets."
"When you release my correspondence to the world at large, do you understand what that information might do."
"Information doesn't do anything, Ra's. Nor does knowledge. These are passive things."
"People then. Do you know what people will do?"
"I sit in a prison. I have very little control over what people do. Only what they know."
"One of your guards. He has a tattoo on his left hand, between index finger and thumb. He covers it with concealer, but it's there."
"Oooh, a ghost story!"
"Think, Julian."
"I have little else to do."
"Make it stop."
"Give Talia my best."
"You've had your fun."
"She had a tattoo as well, last we met. Speaking of fun being had."
CLICK
Who wins?
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We win, that’s how I feel anyway. Both of these made me do a fist pump in the air.
Ra’s pull a scimitar and decapitates Assange.
Over the phone?
What Assange doesn’t know is that while he’s been on the phoen with Ra’s an inaudible frequency has been broadcasted through the line. In a few moments Assange will stand up and feel a sharp pain in his head. He will shake it off as a migraine. The consequences will not be known until his body is found on the floor of his cell the next morning, the word “Bruce” etched into the wall near the floor.
Can this turn into a tag team battle ?
Jullian Assange ,much like the Human Fly, is The Wildest Hero of All because he’s Real!
Wikileaks releases papers detailing Ra’s Al Ghul personal habits. The media runs wild with stories about how Ra’s enjoys coco puffs before bed time and during a briefing with his staff described Lex Luther as a giant “penis-faced tool”
Julian, now out on bail, immediately has sex without a condom. Recidivism is a terrible thing.
In the meantime, the Collision of the Left is formed. Little liberals band together to combat threats too great to be faced individually. Michael Moore leads with the power of iffy editing techniques, John Piler with photos or something, Mick Jagger and Jemma Khan hold hands on use the power of limited attention span… for now. Unfortunely, evil pixies from the dimension of whatever have brain washed the public so, you know, whatever.
Winner
http://i680.photobucket.com/albums/vv162/wonderali/9f67a4c0.jpg
Ra’s kills a LMD of Assange, who is clearly a Marvel anti-hero. Assange reveals the Lazarus Pits, Batman locks up Assange in Arkham. Good game.
@doctorsporen: Locks him up? Assange is the next Robin.
That photo Assange? Not photoshopped
Apparently, Assange was actually Powder.
1)”CLICK” Off comes the wig.
2) Lightning bolt to alGhul
3) Lightning bolt through the wall
4) Sees Cyclops and some clown fighting
5) Lightning bolt to Cyclops
6) Scratches his bald head and addresses Dr Spectro: Dude, I’m Julian Assange and even I’ve never heard of you!
7) Dr Spectro runs over the stunned leaker with what is apparently a hover-Vespa.
8) Dr Spectro goes and downloads Paul’s cool new podcast, “Fuzzy Typewriter presents The Deceptionists
9) Dr Spectro self-publishes his own Franzen sequel: Freedom and polka-dots.
http://www.xkcd.com/