HULK #5
Review by: JohnVFerrigno
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Price: 2.99
This review contains spoilers, click here to read
OK, there is a LOT of violent raging hatred for this book, yet people keep on reading it every month. I am actually one of those people who trash this book and yet can't stop reading it. I actually thought the first issue was decent. not terrific, but it had me excited for issue #2. It has steadily gotten worse and worse. This comic has, in a very short period of time, actually seemed to have become a parody of itself. This book has two separate groups of problems: The problems that are always around in the Hulk title and the problems that are unique to this particular run.
First, there is a recurring problem that i ALWAYS seem to have with the Hulk in recent years. Whenever a new creative team comes along, they tend to use a different version of the Hulk. This, in and of itself, is actually fine. there are different incarnations of the character and different writers like to tell different kinds of stories, so i don't mind when the Hulk suddenly becomes Joe Fixit, or if he is smarter or more savage or whatever. My problem is that it is rarely explained. One issue, the Hulk is an almost mindless force of nature. next issue, he is hyper intelligent. Then, he doesn't transform into bruce Banner, then he does. but the changes are never explained, or even MENTIONED a lot of the time. During World War Hulk, Hulk was a ruthless, calculating, intelligent warrior with the mind of a five star general. How did he get that way? I don't know. After WWH, he was back to being a dumb brute who transforms when angry. How did he get that way? I don't know that one either. This just annoys me to no end.
But now we come to Hulk by Loeb and McGuinness. This comic is just bad on so many levels. I use to hold Jeph loeb in VERY high regard. He has written many of my all-time favorite comics stories and his last take on the Hulk (Hulk: Grey), was, to me at least, riveting and very well done. So when i heard he was writing the relaunch of the character, i was excited. I was expecting the Jeph Loeb I have come to know and admire so much. The Jeph Loeb who really delves into the psyche of a character and shows us what makes them tick. The Jeph Loeb who creates intricate and perplexing mysteries for us readers to wrap our head around and try to decipher. What I got was a whole new Jeph Loeb. A "did i REALLY just read that!?!" Jeph Loeb.
Issue #5 of Hulk is a perfect example of everything that is wrong with this title. Anybody who says that comics are mindless, idiotic entertainment for 8 year olds just need to point to this comic to show us why they believe that. In this comic book, the re Hulk actually JUMPS FROM THE EARTH TO THE MOON! Yes, you read that correctly. The Hulk jumps so high that he escapes Earth's atmosphere and is able to land on the freakin' MOON. The only thing more baffling than the fact that he does this is WHY he does it. As you are probably aware, Thor's mystic hammer MJolnir can not be lifted by anyone who is not worthy of lifting it. But the Hulk jumps into outer space so that he can lift the hammer.
Did i miss a meeting? Since when does ASGARDIAN MAGIC have anything to do with the laws of gravity? The hammer is not unable to be lifted because of gravity or because it is too heavy. it can't be lifted because of a magical enchantment! it doesn't matter if the hammer is on earth, the Moon, the Skrull home world, or up The Fabulous Frog-Man's ass, it can't be lifted by anyone who isn't worthy to lift it!
Then, we have the old Hulk. The famous Green one. He has been buried under some rubble, and is rescued by A-Bomb. The Hulk wants to smash him, but A-bomb says "I'm your friend." To this, the rampaging green beast says "Ok." And they don't fight. Excuse me? I haven't read every Hulk comic for the past 40+ years, but I'm reasonably sure that every single time this Hulk found himself face to face with a super-hero, they always said "Hulk, we are your friends, we don't want to hurt you." and the Hulk replied by whooping their asses. All of a sudden this creature, who is supposed to be the physical manifestation of Bruce Banner's rage, is open to reasonable debate?
There is so much wrong with this comic book that it boggles my mind it got the green light (no pun intended) from the editorial staff at Marvel. What were they thinking? When the Red Hulk sucker punching the Watcher is NOT the dumbest thing in your run, you have some serious issues.
I read this book every month. I will probably continue to do so, because I have this bizarre fascination with having to know what happens next. So even though i don't enjoy the book, there are still questions to be answered and i want those answers. So like a masochist, i will keep on reading it. Also, i keep telling myself "it can't possibly be THAT bad." yet every month I read it and it is worse than i was remembering it to be. I said it before, this book is like a horrific train wreck: tragic and horrible and I just can't look away.
I've never been a fan of Ed Mcguiness' art, either. i know he's very popular and i can see why. he is very talented and there is nothing technically wrong with his pencils, i just don't particularly care for the style. I always found it too cartoony and larger than life, which is actually a perfect fit for this book. It's just not a style I can fully get behind. but it is easily the best thing this book has going for it.
Story: 1 - Poor
Art: 3 - Good
Art: 3 - Good
I know this is weird to comment on my own review, but maybe somebody can help me out: why do my paragraph breaks NOT show up on the review after i hit "submit." Having it as one long paragraph not only makes it hard to read, it makes me look like an idiot. Which I actually am, as i read this title, but i would like to fake intelligence a little bit.
If you don’t like the way something tastes you don’t eat it, right? So why is it that when you don’t like the way something’s written you keep reading it? Set it down if you can’t enjoy it. Sooner or later it’s bound to get back on track. It’s the Hulk, one of Marvel’s flagships. It’s not going anywhere.
Like I said, "less expecting, more accepting". Writers don’t spend years trying to get into the business so they can write what we want, but, rather, what they want.
@ FACE
I read it because I have this thing where if I start reading something, i have to know what happens next. Plus, I like the character of the hulk, so I am going to keep reading it with the hopes that it gets better. Like I said, I usually like Loeb. maybe he can turn it around.
@John – It’s beginning to seem that there are a lot more shitty books than good ones – I’ve been dropping titles left and right. So I’m with you all the way on this: I expect more. Incredible Hulk had so much going for it. Why should this suck so bad? But, because I love the Hulk character, I’m in it for the long haul, good and bad, worse and worser, and I’m trying to put a positive spin from this point on since I’m not going anywhere. Comics seldom live up to our expectations, which is suprising: you might think they’d want to please their readers. Remember it takes time to make changes. I suspect this Loeb M.O. of sparse dialogue and abundant splash pages can’t last forever.
btw: some advice on getting your paragraphs to split up.. hit enter at the point you want your text to start the next paragraph.
@Face
i do hit enter. On the screen where i write the review, it looks right, but when i hit "submit" it changes to the "one long paragraph" format. idk why.
and really, I’m usually not that critical on books. I was praising Trinity from issue 1. I think the Flash is kind of bad, but not as bad a everyone else does. I don’t expect everything to be Dark knight Returns or Watchmen. I just want something that i can read and when I’m done i can say "I enjoyed that." And I enjoy almost every book I buy to some degree. But this book just annoys me. but I like the Hulk so I need to keep getting it to see what happens next. It’s the curse of following a character when you are a comics fan.
yeah, it seemed a little too simple to just say hit enter, but it’s how i get mine to break up. hit ron up thru his email: ron@ifanboy.com. he’s really helpful and prompt. most the tech stuff at ifanboy seems to be his doing.
before i let this go, i must say i’ve got a great deal of respect for those who go against the grain. hearing you say Flash might not be so bad and that you’ve liked Trinity since day one keeps me wondering whose opinion is valid around here, and who actually has their own – opinion. i really like the Flash but won’t pick up the book because of all the bad hype it gets, but you better believe i’m in for Flash: Rebirth
@FACE
Yeah, the same thing happens in my reviews; the separate paragraphs become one long one. IDK why.
And you’re right, Hulk WILL come around sooner or later. It was really bad for a while after the Peter David run and then along came Greg Pak, and now we’re in the valley again, but look! Up ahead! There’s the peak!
@Face
Yeah, Flash is bad, don’t get me wrong. but it’s not AS bad as everyone says it is. I don’t totally hate it, it still has a moment or two that are entertaining. And i think it’s going to start to turn around soon. And Rebirth should be great. I don’t know why everybody hated on Trinity so much. I think expectations were just too high. People were expecting this amazing, epic, classic thing, and what they got was a solid, entertaining comic that was readable and had decent art, and they turned on it. I TRY not to get my expectations too high. I was just hoping for an enjoyable read and that is what I got, so i actually really liked it. I also like the fact that you don’t need a masters degree in DC continuity to enjoy it. If you have a basic understanding of the three characters, you are good to go. it’s kind of got an old-school, 80s vibe to it, too, which i like. So I’m definitely in for the long haul with Trinity. And, for some reason, for Hulk too. 🙂