Top 5: 90s DC Villains With Beards But Not Mustaches

In the early 1990s someone at DC Comics was really enamored with a certain look.

 

Doomsday

5. Doomsday

Granted, this one is a bit of a stretch, because that's not so much hair on Doomsday's face as it is bone. But the way that the bone is depicted clearly recalls hair, especially from a side view where you can see the bone protrudes right along his jaw line up into the hair on his head, which is the same color as the bone, I might add. Besides, everything about Doomsday is genetically engineered for battle, so why not his (bone) beard too?

 

Maxie Zeus

4. Maxie Zeus

Being a delusional super villain who thinks he is a Greek god does not excuse the beard-no-mustache look, even if it would be an appropriate facial hair style choice for the subject of said delusion. To be fair, of all the people on the list, Maxie Zeus' hair is not the weirdest thing about his appearance when you take into account the above the knee tunic.

 

Kalibak

3. Kalibak

When your beard is as long and thick as your hair, and you've got no mustache, then you're really committed to the beard-no-mustache look. That's years and years of work and grooming. And the thing is, now matter how ridiculous you look, when you're the angry and powerful and neglected son of Darkseid, no one is going to say anything other than, "How do you look? Great!"

 

Dr. Hugo Strange

2. Dr. Hugo Strange

As a man who himself has a shaved head and facial hair, I can certainly appreciate the base elements of crazy Dr. Hugo Strange's look. What I cannot abide is the beard-no-mustache look. Shaving your head is a time consuming pain in the ass as it is, but adding the careful shaving off of the mustache seems like a time waster, especially since there are plots against Batman to be hatching.

 

Lex Luthor II

1. Lex Luthor II

In the early 1990s Lex Luthor cloned himself a new body and tried to pass himself off as his own long lost son. Yeah. I'm not making that up. But if that's not bad enough, this rich and powerful man decided that not only was he going to go with a thick, flowing red mullet, but he added a thick Abe Lincoln beard to cap things off. This is a man who can afford a stylist and an image consultant. You know what I think? I think Lex has surrounded himself with Yes Men. "I'm thinking of growing an Abe Lincoln beard. What do you think, Otis?" "That's a great idea, Mr. Lu-thor! And maybe sometimes you can tie your mullet back into a ponytail." "I'll take that into consideration, Otis." And he did the ponytail thing too.

Comments

  1. Cheezdog Cheezdog says:

    Hey, it’s a good look. Most people I know who have had beards have had this style for at least some period.

  2. Mart Mart says:

    I think it’s a terrible look, as bad as soul patches, or vertical chin squiggles – there’s a reason it’s used to represent eeeevil!

  3. stuclach stuclach says:

    Interesting.  I was considering growing a beard, but this article just changed my mind. 

    I love the fact that Luthor cloned himself.  I watched the film "Moon" last night, so now I’m visualizing weird beard Luthor in that role.  Riveting.

  4. This was great.

     I eagerly await the sequel, 90′s villains with mustaches and no other hair. Dr. Mindbender, I’m looking at you.

  5. Truly, this is the sign of evil.

  6. Cheezdog Cheezdog says:

    Actually, i think the longer the beard gets, the greater the need for a mustache. Keep it well maintained and you can make it work, even twenty years on.

    @Mart Most of the people I know who have sported this look ARE rather evil

  7. Jeff Reid JeffR (@JeffRReid) says:

    This is a great list. Most of these characters were big in my heyday of reading comics – the mid-90s – so it made me laugh when I looked through the list. Well done.

    And I like the Hugo Strange appears to have touched a bit of a nerve there, Conor. The man obviously uses his morning shaving time to really work through how to get back at Batman next. Strange finds it relaxing to meticulously groom himself. More people should follow his example.

    But Lex Luthor II? I’ve got no defense of that. Maybe it was because he was trying to pass himself off as Australian. Perhaps the no-mustache look was big down under in the 90s.

  8. Simmons Simmons says:

    I believe your disdain for the bear-no-stache look derives itself from your jealously of college students who sport this look and your yearning for those days of your youth. Poor Conor is all grown up and has ‘sponsibilities :(

    I on the other hand pull off the beard-no-stache fantastically and with my dark curly hari brushed back, I look like some kind of Civil War general black bear. Am I gonna swipe your picnic basket or send in the infantry?!? You don’t know!! :D

  9. Cheezdog Cheezdog says:

    @JeffR it still is! *looks in the mirror*

  10. JesTr JesTr says:

    @JeffR:  He looks more Leprechan than Australian.

  11. Andrew Andrew says:

    I forgot about young Lex. Not nearly as menacing as bald Lex. Didn’t Lex II also "own" some alien Supergirl, too? I just recall Doomsday punching Supergirl and she turned into a purple alien. Or something.

  12. Dan Dan says:

    Note to self – start going for the Amish look.

  13. NJBaritone NJBaritone says:

    A goatee sans mustache a la Phil Jimenez can be pulled off but those Abe Lincoln beards just make me chuckle. Will we see a post from Ron analyzing comic book sideburns next?

  14. Cheezdog Cheezdog says:

    @Andrew Ahhh that was Matrix, and I have memories of her having massive hair and wearing a spiked collar. She disappeared years ago when they ended that version of Supergirl series.. I wonder if that character will ever appear again in the DCU.

  15. Jeff Reid JeffR (@JeffRReid) says:

    @Cheezdog – I KNEW IT!

    @JesTr – The jacket would have to be green for that to be the case. ;)

  16. TehDave TehDave says:

    brilliant list. let’s not forget that lex luthor ii affected an australian accent as well.

  17. flakbait flakbait says:

    Kalibak is dangerously close to neck-beard territory.

  18. BornIn1142 BornIn1142 says:

    Hugo Strange looks disturbingly like Doctor Venture…

  19. Paul Montgomery PaulMontgomery (@fuzzytypewriter) says:

    I totally had a Lincoln or chinstrap beard in high school, starting around sophomore year. I can’t really explain myself. 

  20. WheelHands WheelHands says:

    Great Top 5! I’m a big fan of this look.

    That image of Kalibak is fantastic. Is he doing a Popeye impression? Dancing a jig?

  21. odare77 says:

    So Hugo’s bear is a problem but his purple costume and goggles are just fine?  Let’s be honest the man’s a walking fashion catastrophe.  And as for bone-beards, why did they never catch on?

  22. Mangaman Mangaman says:

    I’ve done the opposite for years. Then not long after highschool I realized that I looked much better clean shaven than I did with a mustache and clean shaven chin.

  23. BatStewie BatStewie says:

    First rule of life: Don’t sweat the small stuff

    Second Rule of life: Never grow a beard without a moustache

    Third rule of life: Everything is small stuff. 

  24. JesTr JesTr says:

    @JeffR: That is becasue he is in disguise. They live among us I tell you… mwahahaha!

    @Bornln1142: That’s awesome I didn’t see it before.

  25. Neb Neb says:

    Oh god, Lex Luthor II.  And here I thought I’d never have to see his mug again!

  26. Matrix Matrix says:

    @Cheezdog Matrix will probably never appear again…uh I mean THAT Matrix will never appear again, as I think that’ll make it too confusing for new readers from an editorial standpoint. Linda Danvers from the 90s supergirl series turned up in reign in hell.

    I WISH all Australians could grow beards like Lex Luthor II. Every time I look in the mirror I get just a little sadder :-(

  27. Crippler Crippler says:

    hahah  I think Conor never fails to bring up Otis every chance he gets… and that is A-OK with me!

  28. JFernandes JFernandes says:

    That Kalibak beard would take a year to grow, tops.  I grew a 7-inch beard in that time, and that’s probably about the length of the base of his chops.

    That being said, we need a Marvel list with Blastaar and Terrax.  More beard-centric articles in general.

  29. adamfarrar says:
    What does this have to do with the ’90s? Three of these characters and their facial hair first appeared before then: Maxie Zeus in ’79, Hugo Strange in ’40, and Kalibak in ’71.
    Of the two who were actually created in the 90s, you admit Doomsday’s bone beard is a stretch.  So the only remaining one of the five is Lex Luthor II.  But yes, the clone body, beard and tied up mullet were weird. 
  30. Conor Kilpatrick conor (@cskilpatrick) says:

    @adamfarrar: These are all scans from the 1990s. It’s quite simple. That’s why it’s not titled "Characters Created in the 90s"

  31. Paul Montgomery PaulMontgomery (@fuzzytypewriter) says:

    How is Lex Luthor II not called Twothor? C’mon, the 90s! 

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